Because I Said So
Wife to one handsome man, mother to three terrific sons and two beautiful daughters-in-love, memere' to two fantastic grandsons; entrepreneur, writer, reader, learner and believer! Thanks for stopping by - Alowetta
Well, I’ve been thinking a lot about this lately, and since it is almost Mother’s Day I figure this is a good time to get it down.
I have 3 grown sons. They own 3 houses in different states. They have 3 passports. A couple of weekends from now, they will simultaneously be in New York, Arizona and Canada.
What does it take for a Mother to give her children roots and wings? If I knew for sure, I would write a book and make you buy it to find out!
I do know it takes two parents – engaged in their children’s lives all the time; playing with them, teaching them, loving them disciplining them, discipling them, BEING with them. I also know that all of those things don’t guarantee a kid will turn out any better than one who lives with one parent who hardly knows he/she exists.
As their Mother, I have had to fight my fears with all my human capabilities. To have boys means to have 1) blood, 2) stitches, 3) casts, etc (you get the drift). They are at once tender and terrifying; at once testing the limits and looking for the boundaries. They have no fear; only curiosity… of everything in life.
I am grateful that my boys talk to me, call me (usually without even being prompted by Dad!), and even occasionally seek my advice. The also ‘roll their eyes’ when I give unsolicited advice – they think I don’t see it, but I have eyes in the back/front/around my head.
Prayer has become my constant companion – and comfort. I have no control over what they choose to do with their lives – whether dangerous, delightful or challenging. I have put them in planes, in cars, in college, and in control of their own destiny….and turned my back to them so they don’t see me crying in pain…and fear…and proud elation at what they have chosen to do with their lives.
And I know without a doubt that they will be back to my side as fast as any transportation can get them to me when I need them.
I believe that is what Roots and Wings are all about. So, Happy Mother’s Day to me – they are THE BEST present I could ever have hoped to receive!
Yesterday, friends of ours drove their 15-year old to a Christian drug rehab program. He will stay there for 90 days and, we all hope, return to our community healed of his drug and alcohol addictions. This Christian family with 4 children is struggling to understand what has happened to their beloved first son who, despite all their efforts, cannot or will not stop abusing.
Today, I was given a priceless gift from my first son, in the form of written words. This child, who might have befallen the same fate at that young age, instead chose the path of right living. No he wasn’t a saint, but he managed to grow himself into righteous human being. His talent - no, gift - for expressing his intellect, emotions and ideas in writing will no doubt be his legacy for his own children.
Two sons, two fates.
I am honored and humbled to receive the precious gift from my son.
I am heartbroken for my friends.
The Lord gives and the Lord takes away; blessed be the name of the Lord. (Job 1:21)
Sunday was a ‘free’ day at all the National Parks in the nation. Marc and I decided to head out to see some great park treasures just outside our back door (almost!), starting with a quick visit up the Colorado National Monument. Monuments are like the ‘minor league’ version of National Parks - not quite a grandiose, but they are still quite fun!
After that stop, we headed west to Utah, home to more National Parks than just about any other state. About a 90 minute drive and we were headed into Canyonlands National Park. The Park is home to a somewhat famous area called the White Rim Trail.
There is a primitive road around that canyon, which is popular with jeepers, mountain bike riders and hikers. 
Forget the list of things I wish I could get for Christmas, I want to make sure my family and friends don’t mistakenly think I might want some of these things:
1. The as-seen-on-tv “Forever Lazy” union suit. Yes, I am forever lazy, but I wouldn’t wear that even around my house.
2. Small, yippy dogs. They are just annoying. You should not have pets that you can carry around in a purse. A dog should be too big to sit in your lap.
3. Skis or ski poles….or anything else that involves playing in the snow or cold all day. I enjoy snow best when seen from the window of my home while sipping a latte by the fireplace.
4. Those small, decorative wine stoppers. I don’t drink that much wine, and it seems to me to be the ultimate in “I don’t really want to spend even a few minutes thinking about what you might like for Christmas.”
5. A ‘Smart’ car. You know, those squished little things you see on the road that resemble a golf cart with a hard top. Smart phones I like - smart cars, no.
Of course, if any of my children or friends have already purchased any above said items, I disavow any of knowledge of this list!
Well, I’ve been absent for a few days. Being sick does damage your goals, more than I remembered. After a quiet Thanksgiving, I intended to do the ‘Black Friday’ shopping thing with a friend.
But instead I spent three days fairly incapacitated with a chronic illness. While being challenged for the past 25 or so years off and on, I had come to a very good part of my life where the chronic nature of the illness didn’t reign supreme in my life.
But this weekend it struck back with a power over me that had not been there for quite a while.
I’m better now, and trying to regain 3 days of my life - it is true that you only have today, and I am reminded of that when I try to recover and get all the things done that I had intended to do during that time.
So, back on track now, and expecting to be busy with this and other things for the rest of the year.
More later!
The turkey has been smoked and eaten, ball games watched, naps taken and the day is almost done. Well, not quite. My friend is driving in from out of town tonight so that we can do the Black Friday shopping - starting at midnight I guess. Or maybe we can wait until 4 am.
At any rate, I don’t think it is too late to say my general Happy Thanksgiving greetings, and make my list of things to be thankful for. Of course, my thankfulness does always begin with my sweet husband, my sons, daughters-in-love and my adorable and perfect grandsons. They are all #1 in my life!
And I’m thankful that I’m in the 1% - that is, the top 1% of the world. We often forget that while we may think we are less fortunate than others around us - that a few people make all the money while we slave for a minimum paycheck - more than half the population of the world lives on $2 a day. Not $2 an hour, $2 a day.
More than a billion people in the world don’t have access to clean drinking water - if there really are 7 billion of us now, that means 1 in 7 people in the world don’t have the privilege of any water near their homes, much less water that is free of disease.
So when I say I’m thankful to be part of the 1%, I mean it. I am grateful that I have a warm home, that my physical, emotional, spiritual and financial needs are being met. I don’t have to wonder if tomorrow I might not have anything to eat, no clean water or even that I won’t be paid for my day’s work.
I am thankful that my family has all those things, also. And I try to show my gratitude by supporting causes that help alleviate problems in my community and in the world. I know I am privileged - but, I don’t take it for granted.
I hope if you are reading this that you are in the 1% also. And you are grateful to be there.
I really like to eat. I mean really! I like to eat! Food tastes good to me, and it makes me feel good - if I don’t eat too much all at once! I like Thanksgiving, because we get to eat food we normally do not prepare during the rest of the year - except maybe at Christmas. Which doesn’t really make much sense - turkey is an inexpensive and healthy meat, and it isn’t hard to cook.
But some of the foods puzzle me - I wonder how we got on the tradition of eating things that we would never eat at any other time of year. On a recent TV show, they reviewed how cranberry sauce is made. Why cranberry sauce? Why not blueberry sauce, or grape jelly? The most popular type of fruit spread to go with peanut butter is grape - not cranberry. The rest of the year we serve our dinner rolls with butter or perhaps honey, but not cranberry. It only comes out of the can for Thanksgiving and Christmas. At least some people make fresh cranberry and orange sauce, but then you are left trying to decide - is it a salad or a spread?
Marshmallows on top of sweet potatoes? What is that - cheap s’mores?
And dressing/stuffing? How did this get started? If I get too much mayo on my sandwich bread and it gets soggy, I won’t eat it. Why do we eat cooked bread, soaked in broth and who-knows-what-else, and then cover it with more liquid, in the form of gravy? And what do you call it anyway? Dressing? Stuffing? And people put all kinds of stuff in it - oysters, rice, nuts….we wouldn’t get away with it any other time of year.
My mother-in-law made dressing from bread and other stuff, and then put lots of chili powder in it. She got the recipe from a neighbor in New Mexico when my husband was young. My brother spent one Thanksgiving with us, and hasn’t stopped talking about it yet.
I have my mother’s recipe for dressing, written in her own handwriting on a scrap of paper. It has measurements for all the ingredients, but at the bottom she has written a note, “I think this is about right. I’ve never made it that you kids weren’t in the kitchen bothering me with all kinds of things, so I just guessed at the everything.” I really cherish that paper every year when I get it out to make the dressing for my turkey.
I love most every food we have at Thanksgiving - and especially love when I have lots of family around the table to share it. And, I love the leftovers of the feast, which is more than I can say for food any other time of the year!
Well, I got one day into my blog-a-day-till-the-end-of-the-year goal, and already failed. There is a great saying about results - “Results - often harsh, always fair.” My intention was to write something everyday, but I let other things - important, or not - get in the way of my goal. Yes, I could justify every thing that I did and that happened to keep me from my goal, but the fact still remains…I didn’t reach the goal.
The wonder of grace is that it is new every day, if we will just take it. So today, I’m taking the grace offered me to start a new day and a new goal. And I’m going to work harder to provide (for myself) results, not intentions.
Thanks for reading!
Well, I’ve been a terrible blogger this year, and instead of waiting until January 1 to make a new year’s resolution, I’m going to start now by declaring that I am going to write daily until the end of the year. Mind you, they may be 2 sentence posts instead of essays, but a goal is a goal, right?!!?!?
So this is me starting today. It really is easier to think about writing daily during the holiday season because I have lots of memories of the holidays – and, even most of them are good!
Yes, it isn’t Thanksgiving yet – we seem to move more and more away from waiting the “appropriate” amount of time after the turkey has been digested to move into the Christmas season. Often growing up, the Thanksgiving holiday was spent decorating for Christmas, since that was the only time we would all be at the house at the same time.
When our boys were younger, we usually made it part of the day-after-Thanksgiving ritual to march up into the snowy mountains to cut the proverbial fresh Colorado spruce tree for our holidays. There is nothing quite like a fresh-cut, smells-like-pine tree to brighten up the house.
But that is another subject for another day!
For today, it’s the Monday before the annual day of Thanks and I’m thankful that there are mostly blue skies outside, my office is warm and I get to ponder things daily for the rest of the year!
We’ll chat again soon!
